Wednesday, 22 September 2010
Drawn - adulthood 07
You know it's the beginning of the end when you look in the mirror one morning and you see something has drastically changed without you noticing it. Now, let me tell you something: I have never had a crease under my bum cheeks. It's just a feature (or lack thereof) of my strangely flat yet square-edged Chinese arse. Words such as 'peachy' and 'pert' have never really applied to it. It's just there, somewhere under the odd folds of my jeans (trousers have never hung quite right on my behind). But I didn't have creases under the cheeks. Not until (I admit, in my increasingly pointless vanity) I deemed to turn round and look at it in the mirror this morning. I'm not gaining weight; I'm not even nearly overweight, but there they were. They were not even the kind of normal creases that some ladies have - you know, a single, well-defined line - but were kind of dry, multiple wrinkles, like my bum's equivalent of crow's feet. I am mortified. I am not even 30 years old yet. Lord help me, I'm dying.